So this heat… Yeah, it’s ridic here in the big apple.  If the city were an actual apple it would have totally apple sauce by now.  I know I am, Yeesh!

Sadly I’m not going to be doing anything to help with this heat wave come Thursday night because I hope to make the city sizzle!  I will be performing at the lovely Bevin Branlandingham’s queer dance party Rebel Cupcake at Sugarland!  This is going to be a night of hot acts, hot bodies, hot music, cold drinks and sweltering dancing on the dance floor.  Don’t slip in the sweat!  I just have to hope I can get my hair to set and my face not to melt off, lol.  I think I’ll work it out, I always do.  But you should come out and give this city a run for it’s money.  I want it all to end with the roof on fire which in this heat wave won’t be too hard.

But come out, see some queer sexiness and shake it like there is no tomorrow, who knows maybe we’ll all burst into flames

huggles and kisses!

I was lying in bed this morning thinking about my life from high school on out.  I had recently gotten a comment from one of my high school friends that said I was “one of a kind”.  The funny thing about that is nothing that would normally seem shocking to others; playing rugby, coming out, moving to New Orleans, working at a Strip club, performing Burlesque, moving to New York; those things were not surprising.  It was the mundane; joining a sorority,getting engaged to a man, becoming an accountant; that shocked them.  I guess there is some truth to who you are at a very young age will be who you are when you are older.

Tiny things, funny enough have stayed the same most of the time.  I always say I get along with men better than women but in reality the majority of my friends are women with a few select amazing men thrown in. (this is my shout out to you guys, Greg, Joey, Tom, Abe) I loved my posse of chicas from high school, Lola, Bunny, Nikita, Roxy and Cha Cha.  This is when Bambi was born and while I might be the only one still going by my nickname, there were personality traits I still see in all these women today.  These women are a perfect example of how we have all changed and yet, I think we still have the same inner workings we had back then.

In college, that was the one time I didn’t have a majority of female friends.  I mean, I ran in huge groups of women, my sorority sisters and my rugby team but it was the fraternity, Tau Kappa Epsilon that I really connected with. They viewed me as a the female equivalent to their brothers and I did feel like those guys were my family.  I remember they were the first group of people on campus I came out to. Well, my new girlfriend on the rugby team also, she knew a little bit before they did but as a whole, they were the firsts.  They were so supportive, I remember sitting at lunch helping some of the brothers figure out the signs some girls were sending them while we rated the other girls that walked by, it was awesome.  They supported me fully and I did for them. So many of them pop into my head while I write this it would be unfair to list just because they all mean so much to me as a whole.  That’s not to say I didn’t have incredible friendships with my sisters, it was just, I was never able to come out to them and I regret that.  I feel like while I did find out some intrinsic information about myself in college, for the first 3.5 years I was so worried about what everyone else thought that I didn’t get to figure myself out enough.

I did however get to figure myself in New Orleans.  Finding out I didn’t like office work, that even if I could rake in over $1,000 in a night I wouldn’t work for people that questioned my ethics, I could stand up to the man and not back down, that there was a passion for performing in me that was not getting met.  These are things I found out there, I also went back to my primarily female friends only this time with a twist. Most of my friends were gay like me.  I loved the crazy adventures I would go on with Jenna, how Andrea’s family accepted me into their fold. I also found my religion in New Orleans and that gave me something to use to better myself mentally and to form a foundation for the type of life I wanted.  I loved my church family very much and I constantly miss them and know they would be proud of me. It’s funny how if I could have stayed in New Orleans I was going to start go -go dancing, yet, due to elements out of my control I had to leave and that was put on hold and yet, I made it back to that anyways.

The initial moving to DC was a shock for everyone that knew me, Bambi’s living at home with her dad?? Bambi got a job as an accountant??? These things did not make sense to me but they were the things that had to happen at that moment in my life. Thank God I met my friend Kalyn at that job or else I would have lost it long before I finally did.  Once I was able to get out of that house though I found myself searching for a way to fulfill that passion to perform. I did that through my family with the Gurly show.  There were people in the troupe I didn’t trust but that’s par for the course.  There were however people in that troupe that helped me find my own voice as a performer and have always encouraged me to create.  Coco, Ginger, Roxy and Codie were my girls through thick and thin with that group.  They were there when others were cruel and being nasty, when I started to deal with the weight gain due to my medicine, they supported me no matter what and I love them all dearly for that.  They were actually some of the biggest supporters in me following my dream and moving to New York.

Now I am here and it all comes back full circle.  When I was about 9 or 10 I would dream of how I was going to move to New York City and become a Broadway actress.  I could envision my one room hole with a hot plate and how I would survive on rice and beans.  I would have nothing to my name but I would be living my dream.  In high school I got voted “Most likely to move to Hollywood” which was only because they didn’t have a “Most likely to move to New York City”.  Somewhere along my journey (about mid way through college) I started to think how unprobable that dream was, that I would never move to New York. But somehow, from figuring out who I was on the inside, a performer, and meeting the right people, The Wasabasco Crew, World Famous *Bob*, Fem Appeal, I found myself coming up here every month.  I started bringing my wife with me, she fell in love with this city and we took the jump.  In some ways it’s been amazing; we have an incredible apartment, we have made really awesome friends, we have a support network we never imagined having; and in someways it’s been hard; I still don’t have employment, I broke my ankle and have been unable to perform for the past 3 months solid; but over all this was the right decision for us and it feels like the truest option for us.  I am a performer, I always have been, I continue to be regardless of the hate that is out there and will continue in some form or another till the day I die.  Everything comes full circle, I dyed my hair pink in high school and pink continues to be my color of choice most often when dying my hair.

When you know who you are, you cannot deny that for anyone or anything.  You just have to have faith that it will all work itself out and that the world is larger than you are.  You just have to go with it.

Huggles and Kisses lovelies.

The new hair with some serious Drag makeup on

Doesn’t mean I’m going to stop enjoying others perform.  My dear friend Sapphire Jones was able to finagle the Pic and me some free tickets to the Sweet and Nasty show tonight, There will be Boobs!  It’s at Public Assembly and it’s going to be extreme!  I love the entire line up and know I will be in the company of many good friends so I’m not too worried about being able to get a seat or being pushed around.  I’ll have muscle It’s going to be a great show though and I’m excited to go out in public for the first time since the injury.  So, if you are in the mood for some amazing breasts along with a good show and want to sign a cast, come on out to Public Assembly tonight.  It will be a raucous good time.

Huggle and Kisses!

Oh my goodness, the incredible amazingness that was the New York Burlesque Festival has come and gone.  I am sad but so happy just from the amazingness of the entire weekend.  I only made it to 3 of the 4 shows, I know, I’m a loser but I don’t know how my head would still be intact if I saw any more inspiring acts.  Also if I talked to anymore stars!! Good God, I don’t know if I will ever lose the amazement that I get to call such incredible performers my colleagues. I had the best conversation on Friday night in the green room with Roxi D’lite, first runner up at Miss Exotic World.  I also shared really sweet words on Sunday with Orchid Mei and Mimi Le Meux as well as Viola Vixen.  Gosh, if I were to name everyone I had a wonderful time with this would just look like a call sheet.  So many wonderful people and great friends.

I got the greatest compliments from the people I was assisting with as well.  I kept the shirt orders in check, I handled the VIPs for the Golden Pasties, I was Jen’s right hand woman whenever she needed some assistance.  Many a free drink came my way due to my awesomeness, lol.  The highlights though were definitely walking the red carpet and joining everyone on stage afterwards.  Plus the sweet sweet things Angie Pontani said to me.  It really touched me.  God, I am just blown away that this is my life sometimes.  That I get to be part of something bigger than myself.  Regardless of if I ever win a title or perform at a festival I am a burlesque performer and that can never be taken away from me.  I have entertained and been entertained and this is truly who I am.

I cannot stop gushing about all the wonderful people I worked with this weekend and just hung out with.  I am so happy to call New York my home and all my other performers my brothers and sisters.  Thank you for letting me part of it.

And now for those that didn’t make it, here are the Golden Pastie winners!!

Most Classic: Dirty Martini
Kissing Bandit: Tigger!
Biggest Shlep: Amber Ray
Most Likely to miss a kidney: Sparkly Devil
Most Missed Revue: Starshine
Most innovative: Darlinda Just Darlinda
Most likely to appear in Playboy: Angie Pontani
Biggest Hair: Darlinda Just Darlinda
Most Likely to win at Monopoly: Angie Pontani
Best Ass: Helen Pontani
Most Elegant: Amber Ray
Hottest Freshman: Lil’ Miss Lixx
Most Sensual: Kelita tie Peekaboo Pointe
Biggest Cougar: Jo Boobs
Best Body: Dirty Martini
Hottest Mess: Wildcard Kitty

In my mind though everyone that performed was a winner, they were all stunning, all brought incredible talent and all inspired me to want to not only do more but be more.  Thank you all of you for that.

Well off to do those bigger and better things now!

huggles and kisses

Yesterday was my third birthday as a burlesque performer.  If you had told me that Wednesday night 3 years ago I would move to NYC to pursue a career further in burlesque I would have thought you were insane.  I would have thought that was out of my league.  Now I know that I have grown as a performer and that I just feel the growth continuing.

I celebrated yesterday by going to my favorite store in Brooklyn, Re/Dress and just ogling all of their fineries.  There’s a dress I REALLLLY want but being of the unemployed beast I didn’t get it.  Then I went down to the Slipper Room and took a class with Jo Boobs and Julie Atlas Muz.  Both such incredible women and I really gained a lot from the teachers and my fellow students. Then it was off to meet the POC at Kitty Nights.  It was a fun show with cute acts.  Good times were had and we truly enjoyed ourselves.

I feel like I am assimilating into living in New York very well.  I am catching onto the subway system which is good.  I actually have had people ask me for directions!  That’s always a good sign.  Things over all just feel calmer in the spirit here.  Maybe that’s cause we haven’t been around long enough to be part of any drama but that’s ok by me.

Oh, I am so sorry for my slacking on everything.  While I do love love love New York the majority of my energies have been going into trying to find employment.  My mind gets so one tracked and it’s all I can focus on.  Hopefully soon though.  I actually have had a few interviews and have at least one more lined up with a wait on a phone call as well.

So yeah, I’m going to try to make myself post atleast twice a week and do a video blog once a week.  Maybe one written post and one video, I don’t know.  We shall see though but I will do more to stay in contact with you all.  And I am going to focus this upcoming year on fine tuning my performances.  Making them sparkle more, making them more wow factor and such.

Huggles and kisses

These past few weeks have been incredibly hectic and without internet made it all the harder.  But I am back and better than ever!  This is my first post from my new New York apartment!  I’ve done it!  I’ve moved and it’s to the city that never sleeps and I can feel the pulse that keeps it up right now.

It’s still so surreal that I am here.  I can remember just little under a year ago talking about NYC after my first visit since I was in high school.  How amazing all the sites were, how the performance people were so kind, how I felt at home there and she said, well maybe someday we can live there, and now we do!  It feels like we’re house sitting.  This can’t actually be our apartment.  We can’t actually be living in NY.  I mean, I was just performing 2 days ago at Palace in their anniversary show, how could I now live in NY?? That’s silly.  But true.

Someone once told me the sky looks different in Brooklyn.  They are right.  It’s incredible, I don’t know if it’s the city but it seems to have a hint of peach in it at all times so far.  And the sounds, I love the sounds.  You hear people passing, cars and trucks honking, conversations in a multitude of languages.  right now the most apparent noise is my neighbor taking out his recycling, lol.  I also hear the soft snore of my PiC sleeping next to me after the 6 crazy days we just had. It went, I performed, she performed, I performed, I got sick, we packed our entire lives, we unpacked our lives.  Can’t blame a girl for being sleepy.

We did however pick up a local newspaper and may hit up the Putt Lot tomorrow and I might try and take her to Coney if I can get her out of the house, though it’d probably be wiser if we stayed in and unpacked as much as we could.  I do know we are going to Darlinda Just Darlinda’s show on Thursday and that will be exciting! And so the adventures of Bambi Galore in the Big Apple begin.  And no matter what happens I can grow old and tell my kids I did it, I lived out my dream to live in New York!

Huggles and kisses!!

A day off. To myself no less. I thought I had a hair appointment today but it’s actually tomorrow so I have not had any reason to get out of bed! It’s super nice. That is, not to say, that I don’t have a foot long list of chores to do for the house, the move and burlesque, it just means I’m ignoring them all. It’s still nice.
This weekend was incredible. I really do like performing several nights in a row. It makes me feel alive. I am also so so happy to have picked up the supplies I needed for those two costumes. $180 at the end of it all! But still a good investment for what’s going to be some really awesome pieces. I hope.
This month is going to fly by so fast! I only have two weeks left of the day job then all energies will be on moving. But don’t think my burlesque calendar has gotten any light, oh no! I’m still jumping up and down from DC to Richmond and back all month. It’s actually a good thing that the PiC has decided to steal my final show from me. She’s running the whole thing people! I have no control, as an artist or a producer. I’m scared but excited. I do know though that it’s going to be an insane line up. And one raging party!
Oh, I am over stimulated mentally so I am going to let you go. Oh there are grand things on the horizon, for everyone I feel. Just keep looking to the sky for tomorrow and soon it shall be here.
Huggles and kisses!

I have kept this as quiet as I possible can because I didn’t want to jinx it but the PiC and I are moving.  To the Big Apple!  The PiC talked with her job and will be working remotely from an office in the Meat Packing District.  What I will be doing for finances, I don’t quite know yet but hopefully I will be performing still so that might help.  I also wouldn’t mind continuing to work in the field that I do now during the day.

This is a truly exciting time in our lives right now!  When I was a little girl I always dreamed of moving to New York to become a performer and now I am doing just that.  Ok, so as a little girl it was to be a Broadway Super Star but I am ok with just being a little guppy in the grand sea of burlesque queens out there.  Who knows, maybe it will be my big break!

So yes, I am sadly leaving the town that has been my haven for the entirety of my burlesque career but only to continue to watch it grow in a larger arena.  Here’s to the future!

Huggles and Kisses!

The business cards.  I forgot all about all those business cards from contacts I had made over the past few weeks.  It’s really mentally kicking my ass right now because there are people that I’m like, oh, I’d like to contact them but wait….  It sucks.

I mean it could be worse.  It could always be worse, lol.  But luckily I have a lot of good going on,  This week is slow but for one show that is an act of love on Saturday and that makes me happy.  Next week will also be slow, another show I love on Saturday but otherwise a week to just center, costume and hang with some friends I hope.  Yay.

So I’m feeling peaceful.  I’m feeling good and I can’t wait till next week to truly just relax.

huggles and kisses

Now I’m going to start off by saying I still love the city.  I love the people, the shows, the food and everything else.  But there is a small underlying piece of suck.  That would be the person/people that chose to break into my car while I was performing on Tuesday night.  Yeah, had an amazing show with Weirdee Girl and Menace hosting and sharing the stage with Clams Casino, Gal Friday, Nasty Canasta and Fem Appeal.  It was an amazing cast which led to an amazing show.  The PiC even won another raffle, this time it was 50’s porn, sweet! 

But yes, the car got broken into.  They got my wallet, my coat, some work shirts, the video camera, my boob necklace, my burlesque notebooks and my phone oh and everything I had made performing.  It sucked.  The things that kill me are the necklace, the notebooks and not even the video camera but the video ON the camera.  Sigh.  The cops were helpful, I guess. Weirdee and Menace were awesome, getting me shots and making sure all my stuff at the bar was safe while we dealt with this.

Oh New York, how you tease me.  You make me love so much of you, you get me to share so much of myself with you.  Then you send me crashing back to reality but you make sure the fall is still on a soft cushion of love and friendship.  How can I hate you? I can’t.  

Huggles and Kisses mes amis!